ProvedIt

Update: The post I had scheduled for Monday will be posted tomorrow. After what happened today…I won’t rewrite or re-edit it.

These thoughts were triggered by more proof…

This morning I woke up in an ‘in between’ mood. I wasn’t happy and I wasn’t sad. But when I went to find a YT video to occupy my mind…my energy started to run away from me. I couldn’t catch back up to a high vibration, after all my intentional heavy breathing, so I felt guided to purge what was sitting on my psyche to the Gang Goofy group chat. (SS’s below.) Before sending the first text I knew what the outcome was going to be because this is not my first dramatized cry for help. That, unfortunately, didn’t stop the tears from running down my cheeks when I received responses I had already anticipated. Tears usually lead to tussles so instead of doing my own version of the ‘manic’n’ challenge…I decided to keep my peace. I went on about my day feeling accomplished because they didn’t get the reaction they wanted. I can’t say that feeling did much for my emotional disposition throughout the day though because I was not the TT that my niece is used to interacting with when she gets in the car. I wasn’t as talkative and my energy prompted her to ask if I was tired. I honestly am and after I told her I was she simply asked for my phone and entertained herself.

We had a few stops to make because her school has had a lot of activities the last couple weeks and I love all things themed. So we did some retail scavenger hunts, got some food and made our way to her mother. The usual. I always let my little sister know when I’m on my way so that I’m not sitting outside waiting for her like I have in the past. This is an argument we have gotten into too many times to recall because my little sister is too entitled to consider anyone else’s time but her own. This behavior hasn’t been displayed since…………….yesterday. She’s committed. Yesterday she claimed her phone died right after my text, telling her I had pulled up to get my niece for a party, showed delivered. She took her time coming out but I ignored it because ‘CC’ came to the car with a cute outfit and her hair was done. I’m assuming my lack of reaction is what led to the trigger attempt that took place when I came to drop her child off today. It’s beyond obvious, at this point, that my peace is what they’re trying to disrupt and it’s giving desperation.

I sat waiting for her to come out for 18 minutes. This is normally a 2 minute exchange. (SS within the SS’s below.) No explanation, no apology, no gas money..nothing. Once again, I feel like a ‘lick’ who has been ‘child trapped’ by a family full of bitters. Their expectations of me, in regards to my sister’s child, makes me feel like they are trying to make up for the fact that I outsmarted my first two ‘trap artists’. I spoke about the single mom curse running rampant in my family and how I avoided that reality by way of seed deletion(s). But now, I legitimately feel my ‘family’ is trying to vicariously induce the negative feelings that experience could have given me through my niece. All while continuing to exclaim how mentally ill I am.

When I take into account the fact that there is currently a new moon orbiting…I’m almost annoyed enough to delete my post from yesterday, giving them the benefit of the doubt, because I KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. These people use my niece to trigger ‘manic’ reactions from me and they always do it around new and full moons. I have to stress again that I have no idea what the significance of this timing is but my ‘tainted’ observations picked up on the pattern a long time ago. Add that in with the fact that my twin told me I’d never be the ‘chosen’ one, my ability to speak on things that haven’t happened yet, my knowledge of my twin dibbling and dabbling in spell work, my ongoing isolation, my ‘family’s award winning ability to gaslight me about the emotional abuse they inflict, and the conveniently timed issues I keep having with my leasing office that disturb my home life(currently in the middle of handling another one via email)….and you have my reasoning for believing this is a spiritual war. These ‘dizzy demonics’ have all their basis covered. I chose yoga and music as my armor today. So far so good.

Love,

Choosy